The hazy lecture halls, Lund cathedral in wisps.
I think my memory is getting worse. I lose names and faces and facts and dates. The tip of my tongue is becoming a place I visit far too often.
More lists maybe?
1. Blog more
2. Read more
3. Learn more
4. Get out of your damn comfort zone you big pussy!
Showing posts with label Nightmares. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nightmares. Show all posts
Saturday, 10 April 2010
Saturday, 23 January 2010
"The bull and the bear are marking their territories...
...They're leading the blind with their international glories."
5pm to 5am, service as usual?
I think I got my waking hours the wrong way round today.
I sort of stumbled into consciousness and it was already dark outside.
I think I fear the day. Those normal business hours are daunting. Unless there is something planned or somewhere I have to be, I tend to get lost with possibility.
This impossible freedom means I eat when I’m hungry and sleep when I’m tired. Even though I know that’s not how I'm supposed to do things.
Mainly because I’m always tired and never hungry.
But if I’m asleep then the thoughts that weigh me down turn to dreams. And the lack of control over those dreams is comforting. Whether they are my subconscious seeping out or just a random mix of confusing electrical impulses, memory or fantasy, there is nothing I can do to change them. And I’m ok with that. They are something no one else sees or cares about. Nothing important. And that's what I need more of, things I don't have to worry about.
Circadian rhythms, guns and caves, this psychology is messing with my head.
Goodnight, sweet dreams x
5pm to 5am, service as usual?
I think I got my waking hours the wrong way round today.
I sort of stumbled into consciousness and it was already dark outside.
I think I fear the day. Those normal business hours are daunting. Unless there is something planned or somewhere I have to be, I tend to get lost with possibility.
This impossible freedom means I eat when I’m hungry and sleep when I’m tired. Even though I know that’s not how I'm supposed to do things.
Mainly because I’m always tired and never hungry.
But if I’m asleep then the thoughts that weigh me down turn to dreams. And the lack of control over those dreams is comforting. Whether they are my subconscious seeping out or just a random mix of confusing electrical impulses, memory or fantasy, there is nothing I can do to change them. And I’m ok with that. They are something no one else sees or cares about. Nothing important. And that's what I need more of, things I don't have to worry about.
Circadian rhythms, guns and caves, this psychology is messing with my head.
Goodnight, sweet dreams x
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